|"Did you mail that letter to Emma yet?"|
This is why I love my readers so. One among you, Tim, forwarded me a link from PornMD, which is a porn search engine where dear Tim coulda been looking up any weird-ass thing he desired, including such videos as "Bianca's Insane Monster Bush" or "This Ass Ain't So New Anymore."
But what tweaked his fancy was a nerdy sociological chart, Global Internet Porn Habits Infographic. There, you can click on a state or country and learn brain-clogging information such as "monster cock (gay)" is the second most popular search term in Kenya. Or that the more racist a southern state seems, the more likely "ebony" will be the most popular porn. Or that the people of the Czech Republic have a thing for "castrated shemales" and Icelanders like "prostate massage."
I also learned that it was a bad idea to click on the term "old man porn." Though, in hindsight, that probably should have been self-evident.
2. Happiness is a Warm Bum
|Not sure what "healing" implies.|
Wrote Luis at Cracked: "We were rather discouraged to find out that the light bulb was not activated solely by the mighty electrical currents generated by a human rectum like a potato in a 4th grade science fair project." Indeed. I also kind of want the light to make that little sound Rudolph's nose makes when it lights up, but I think the Prostate Warmer technology of 1925 was not quite there.