Thursday, March 14, 2013

Contest: Write a Six-Word Sexual Memoir

6 words: See-though partner kinda freaking me out.
Now that we've mastered the delicate art of bad erotic haiku, we now move onto the Six-Word Memoir. The six-word memoir was popularized by Smith Magazine spurred by a challenge Hemingway was reportedly given to tell a story in six words. He wrote: "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." (Although since Hemingway was known to leave his stories at a good stopping point so he'd be inspired the next day, perhaps the first day's draft read: "For sale: baby shoes, never...")  I told my 11-year-old about the six-word stories and she went off to her room, coming back with "Party after war--no one came." 

So yes, you can go all dark like Papa and my dear daughter, or you can take it whatever direction you'd like. My instructions are just this: write your sexual memoir in just six words.

The winner, chosen randomly, because who the fuck am I to judge your Art, man, will be announced Tuesday March 19.


The prize is this Play-Doh-looking Butterfly Bliss Silicone Waterproof Vibrator courtesy of Good Vibrations. This g-spot intensive, plus outer stimulation set-up, according to my sex toy-selling friend, is good. Damn good. So you might wanna work for this one. Or if you'd rather just buy your way into it, click here.

Leave entries below as a comment or drop me a line at: jillhamilton001@gmail.com.

xoxox
jill

(photo source: Lady Cheeky)

52 comments:

Katrina said...

Catholic conservative runaway seeking sexy bliss

Sandra Davies said...

Ignorance, insufficient imagination: inescapable, lifelong tedium.

kekti said...

Beautiful beginnings with too soon endings.

Silenus said...

Miscegenation, Polyamory, Bisexuality, BDSM, Ming's grace.

Silenus
apples75698@mypacks.net

Can't keep anything to myself said...

Love it. Did the same thing in a creative writing class once. Not about sex though haha. Also, your daughter sounds like a badass. That's some deep shit coming from an 11 year-old.

Love blooms. Expiration date: spring's end.

Lizzies Valentine said...

precocious preteen found jewish erotica: eureka!

not exactly "Saint" Michael said...

Lonely, awkward. Learned women, happy now. :D

Btw, I do indeed love your entire blog. I wave my penis respectfully in your general direction.

Anonymous said...

More often than not: my hand.

little-ribbit said...

Late bloomer now unrepressed sex goddess.

Spiffy McBang said...

Wanna have fun? Aw, why not?

Ophelia said...

Silent success, as dorm mate snored

:)

Meg Cooper said...

Twenty-five years later, he came again.

jill hamilton said...

Loving these.

Jeanne Hospod (@jeannehospod) sent this via Twitter for inspiration:

this isn't mine but thought I'd share 6words frm @MargaretAtwood 's brilliant sparkly brain: "Longed for him. Got him. Shit"

Andy Hammond said...

Please please please please THANK YOU!

mostly_harmless said...

No, it's okay. Maybe next week?

Yinna said...

After 30 seconds: "OH!...shit. Sorry"

Rys said...

We tried it, we liked it.

in bed with married women said...

Some that came via email:

T: Wanna get it on? Too tired.

Butterfly bliss vibrator needs more batteries.

C: Lost you. Idiot me. Now redeemed. (true story)

J: Wrapped in the potential of you

MySS said...

Good loving gone bad, New lover

Anonymous said...

Ashley Madison... wanna chat?, finally satisfied!!!

Anonymous said...

involuntary virgin until marriage, always horny.

I.Akirov said...

Pants dropped, bush reveals, sex-scent flood!

Christina said...

Twenties, eh. Thirties, oh! Forties, YEA!

tineke said...

Nice warm-up, too short, almost came :-(

Anonymous said...

Online dating too frustrating. Home masturbating.

lgettings said...

Experimentation nearly kills me. Lesson learned!

Stacey Shelton said...

Boys or girls?? I chose both.

Anonymous said...

69, toys, oral, anal, doggy?.....endless! :D

Anonymous said...

in WHERE?! Oh! Now I'm addicted.

Just a girl said...

Multi-orgasmic. Need I say more?

Highly sexual woman said...

I am a slut. Love it!

Dicky Carter said...

No orgasm again, she buys dildo.

Spanking Theatre said...

Anticipation. Giggles. Exposure.

Merging. Crescendo.

Happiness.

Robbo said...

Playful, giving, getting, endless...

toni in florida said...

Thank Eros it gets better... still.

Maia said...

Hungered for reciprocity, then found daddy!

Indolent said...

Too shy for reality; reads erotica.

Winter said...

Magical tongue causing crescendo . . . thundering release!

Wendy said...

Babies first, then bliss: Second marriages!

Anonymous said...

I have a dear writer friend who publishes fine smute (pronounced smoo-tay) under a pseudonym online.

Sad to say he's a little shy about directing credit/traffic from a larger forum like this (even to a pseudonym) but he likes fast and dirty writing challenges so he gifted me with several entries.

I did it for her lips.

Never not thinking of fucking.

Sore and spent but worth it.

Always longing for one more lick.

Lost for a long, thick reason.


--Jeanne H.

B. said...

Late start. One grand passion. Done?

in bed with married women said...

More via email for your reading enjoyment:

from S: Mama said no kissing. But fucking?

from L: olfactory susceptibility drives brief inadvisable affairs

fitzlurker said...

One spouse; too many other women.

Anonymous said...

Masturbator: "everyone else's mouth drips cum"

Anonymous said...

I wish I could send you mine!

Samantha said...

He is broken; I am frustrated.

Anonymous said...

Fake my orgasms, even when alone.

Anonymous said...

My husband won't but my boyfriend will.

3deepbreaths said...

in bed with married women... whee!

Anonymous said...

Porn shoot ends with tranny threesome

[sɐ mʌn ta] said...

Soft skin and two velvet tongues.

The Artist Formerly Known As Bagel Fairy said...

I long for the virgin's cock.

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