After finding herself divorced, in her 50s and recovering from a
tepid sex kind of marriage, Erica created A Sexy Woman of a Certain Age to explore, celebrate and encourage sexual confidence in older broads. Who, I will remind you again, are sexy as fuck.
Her blog is smart, sexy and real and I admire Erica in all kinds of ways, not the least of which is that her Twitter handle is @OhGodErica.
(Is there really any better sequence of words than "Oh God (insert your
name here)"? But, you know, with your actual name instead of "insert
your name here.")
If you haven't been over to her blog, do so at once. But first, have a lot at Erica's "My 7 Most Erotic Experiences," take a shower, then head over after you look presentable.
******
Erotic: of, devoted to, or tending to arouse sexual love or desire.
I
live on the tenth floor of a high-rise and my bedroom windows give me a
wide view into the rooms of the surrounding apartment buildings. I love
the feeling of sun on my skin so I tend to leave the blinds open while I
get dressed in the morning. I’m a bit of an exhibitionist — shocker, I
know! — so I also tend to leave the blinds open when I get undressed at
night.
One evening I was traipsing around my bedroom in my
lingerie looking at the neighboring building. Directly across from me
was a man standing perfectly still at his window. Peering at me. There
was too much distance between us to make out his face, but I could see
his torso. It was shirtless, lean, and lovely. We stood like that for a
bit, until a woman appeared behind him. He continued facing me and I
felt a surge of warmth from my groin as I inhaled sharply. But the woman
must have said something because he closed the blinds.
I stood there, irked that my erotic Rear Window
fantasy had been cruelly yanked from under me. Ever since I’ve moved
into the high rise, I’ve hoped to catch a glimpse of a couple in
flagrante delicto.
And I’ve hoped that the man in that couple would watch me watch him.
* * *
Last
Sunday morning I laid in bed sipping hot coffee and gazing out my
sun-streaked bedroom window. I remembered the moment with the man across
the street and wondered if he would ever indulge my voyeuristic
inclinations. It was a such a brief snapshot in time, but one with a
visceral pop in my erotic memory.
As I made my way to the bottom
of my coffee mug, I thought about what makes some sexual experiences
sexier than others. Sometimes it’s the level of emotional intimacy.
Sometimes it’s the degree of novelty and risk. And sometimes it’s just
an exquisite blend of pheromones: a profound chemistry with someone who,
at first glance, might not even be someone you would normally choose to
be with.
So before it was time to drag myself out of bed and
dive into my weekend to-do pile, I decided to play a game with myself. I
let my mind drift back over my sexual history and pick the first seven
erotic memories that materialized — and that still left a palpable
charge.
The Voyeur
One summer afternoon when I was
nine years old, I was doing underwater somersaults in a friend’s pool.
When I came up for air, I saw my friend’s older sister french-kissing
her boyfriend. They were kissing beautifully, passionately, oblivious
to the gawking string-bean treading water nearby. I heard moans and
murmurs. I knew I was witnessing something private, and I should turn
away, but I was mesmerized. Whatever they were doing, I wanted it. Maybe
not now, but someday.
That make-out session was soulful, and
blazingly erotic. It is etched into my arousal template, a visceral
blueprint for passion.
The Erotic Kiss
I grew up
in a university town. Every year at graduation time, high school kids
would wall-vault their way onto campus, cavorting with drunken graduates
and alumni during a three-day long bacchanal. The summer I was sixteen,
I was desperately in love with a 15-year-old Adonis. Rumored to have
lost his virginity at 13, he was a star athlete and a bad boy. Every
girl wanted him. We had had an ongoing flirtation, and that balmy night,
buoyed by beer and hash, we drifted from the pack. We stood in the
middle of the quad, wondering where our friends had gone. I looked up to
see him flashing that rogue smile as he drew me into him.
No
one had ever kissed me like this. His lips and tongue moved expertly
over mine, and I could feel his erection as he pushed his pelvis against
me. Lurching footsteps and peals of laughter swirled around us as we
melted into each other in a sensuous embrace that I hoped would never
end. I wasn’t just aroused; I was transported. My body felt that it had
merged with his. I had crossed over from garden-variety adolescent
make-out sessions into an almost mystical realm of lust and tenderness.
We
dated for a few weeks, but I wasn’t ready to surrender my virginity. He
took his coke-can sized penis elsewhere, leaving me in a heartbroken
heap.