tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post234864643985282375..comments2024-03-21T18:26:23.834-07:00Comments on In Bed With Married Women: Real Sex Lives: Lucia, "Not all infidelity automatically makes you a jerk."Jill Hamiltonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14989469118118455602noreply@blogger.comBlogger14125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-27973951440158050422013-11-23T18:10:46.522-08:002013-11-23T18:10:46.522-08:00Anonymous, the recent--Yes, True Lovers' Tales...Anonymous, the recent--Yes, True Lovers' Tales. I'll do it!in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-59236395854357839552013-11-23T09:29:51.963-08:002013-11-23T09:29:51.963-08:00I agree that not all cheating makes you a jerk, bu...I agree that not all cheating makes you a jerk, but this guy doesn't seem to have a valid reason (e.g. sexless marriage, spouse in coma) to be dishonest with his wife, so I'm not sure he qualifies. Still, Dan Savage is right on the money in saying we need to prioritize stability over absolute monogamy.<br /><br />And you should call the feature "True Lovers' Tales."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-59531372299589991212013-11-21T10:08:40.125-08:002013-11-21T10:08:40.125-08:00CKATM, I am more the Duchess of Dualities. I salut...CKATM, I am more the Duchess of Dualities. I salute you, oh queen.in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-73732266164323476342013-11-20T11:43:54.769-08:002013-11-20T11:43:54.769-08:00I love ambiguity. I am the Queen of Ambiguity. I love ambiguity. I am the Queen of Ambiguity. Can't Keep Anything to Myselfnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-31273960780961558732013-11-20T11:11:56.678-08:002013-11-20T11:11:56.678-08:00CKATM--So good to hear from you! I'm digging ...CKATM--So good to hear from you! I'm digging that you're not only handling existing in the gray zone but thriving. in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-61961391064906314742013-11-19T16:37:24.139-08:002013-11-19T16:37:24.139-08:00Interesting! I love the complexity of these storie...Interesting! I love the complexity of these stories! Most people hate things that are not absolute, do not have an answer or that can not be labeled, but I love that this is so open-ended. I want to reflect on it. I appreciate it, but I still don't know how I feel about it. How should I feel about it? How do I want to feel about it? I don't know what the answer is, and that's both liberating and unsettling. Can't Keep Anything to Myselfnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-31144137289493844882013-11-18T11:25:14.645-08:002013-11-18T11:25:14.645-08:00Anonymous "Lucia": Thanks for sparking ...Anonymous "Lucia": Thanks for sparking the topic. Hope you don't hate the name I gave you. <br />Anonymous, the next: Sorry about the sighing. I am thinking about how strange it is that we have set up our society so that so many among us are not having--what seems to me--to be a basic pleasure of life, maybe even the greatest life pleasure of passionate sexual intimacy. Meaning yes, someone who is "into it."<br />Anonymous, the most recent: "Matters of the heart are best left uncivilized if you want to experience the wonder nature intended." Holy fuck that's good.in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-12834433082746613662013-11-18T05:37:19.957-08:002013-11-18T05:37:19.957-08:00This seems to be a conflict between the "laws...This seems to be a conflict between the "laws of man" and the "laws of nature". We are the only species that marry. Why? Because the "laws of man" include ownership of property, regulation of wealth and social status. These are rewards for our adherence to the conduct civilization requires.<br />Matters of the heart are best left uncivilized if you want to experience the wonder nature intended.<br />I expect everyone here who has crossed that line drawn by our society, understands this. Knowing the punishment an open discussion of our animal nature would exact, we sign these comments with "Anonymous".Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-49465161581310422462013-11-17T21:06:16.940-08:002013-11-17T21:06:16.940-08:00Interesting story. I can sympathize. My wife and I...Interesting story. I can sympathize. My wife and I have decent sex. She does her best to please me but there is really no passion. I don't think it was ever there. But she is my best friend and we do pretty well together. But it would be nice to be intimate with someone who actually is responsive and "into it". Sigh...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-57867229878627445832013-11-17T18:36:30.259-08:002013-11-17T18:36:30.259-08:00I wrote this post and I should add--their sex life...I wrote this post and I should add--their sex life is fine as far as I can tell. Obviously, we don't discuss it, because of course that's private. But, before it became a completely off-limits topic it was clear to me that their sex life is fine. They have kids and of course they been together forever so I'm sure it ebbs and flows but as far as I can tell it's just sort of your standard sex life. He's not neglecting her for me, I feel confident. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-44849741424429685082013-11-17T18:30:28.095-08:002013-11-17T18:30:28.095-08:00Anoymous--wow. would love to hear the rest of your...Anoymous--wow. would love to hear the rest of your story and what happened, if you ever feel like writing it down. in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-39138167091797986742013-11-17T18:15:26.807-08:002013-11-17T18:15:26.807-08:00My hubby having an affair would most certainly be ...My hubby having an affair would most certainly be a deal breaker for me. But with good reason - I can't remember the last time we had sex (6 months? a year?). It's been for a variety of reasons over our fifteen year marriage: kids (inherited), physical ailments/surgeries, life stresses. Otherwise our relationship is solid. But I have been making it quite clear now that I need a lot more intimacy, real soon. So if he were doling it out elsewhere, that would definitely make him a jerk and he'd be out the door.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-72412558851059648232013-11-17T17:35:01.058-08:002013-11-17T17:35:01.058-08:00Anonymous--Thanks! Interesting. I've actually...Anonymous--Thanks! Interesting. I've actually never heard anything like that--where it ended up being something light and hot in the marriage. ps sooo not getting involved in the boss/hooker question.in bed with married womenhttp://www.inbedwithmarriedwomen.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4339155460200866959.post-71814325628697986072013-11-17T17:19:05.141-08:002013-11-17T17:19:05.141-08:00I agree. My wife and I cheated on each other in t...I agree. My wife and I cheated on each other in the 11th month of our first year of marriage, independently and coincidentally, probably because we were having a tough time. But she felt so guilty so she told me, and it led to some of the best sex we've ever had. And now, 12+ years later and 3 kids, we're still together and can laugh about it. (aside: which is worse, a wife giving her boss a blowjob in London, or a husband going to a strip club and then getting a handjob from a hooker? Asking for a friend...]Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com